Phoenix Kaspian is an artist and musician based in Berlin. He is also part of a decentralised network of individuals who support psychedelic therapy outside the boundaries of the traditional clinical or shamanic models. A survivor of sexual abuse in childhood, Phoenix’s own journey through trauma has spanned from conventional psychoanalysis in western cities, to experiences with the shamanic cultures of the Amazon jungle; somatic experiencing; then to LSD, and finally to MDMA therapy. Phoenix is a proponent of leaderless, community-led healing, free from the expense and hierarchy of the old ‘patient’ and ‘therapist’ or ‘shamanic’ paradigms.
Healing Yourself: MDMA therapy without a therapist.
Psychedelics saved me from depression, anxiety, and suicide. As a child, growing up in London, I was beaten and sexually abused at home, in church, and at school. This same crime was committed against many thousands of children across the UK, and millions across the world. I treated the resultant complex-PTSD using a combination of therapies including conventional psychoanalysis, ayahuasca, ibogaine, San Pedro cactus and somatic experiencing. But it was not until I discovered low-dose LSD and MDMA therapies that I was able to get to the root causes of the trauma, and finally release decades of fear and anger. This was done outside a clinical setting; with educated friends. In healing, I found that others with similar trauma naturally gravitated towards me; and others towards them. This is the story of how a growing community of abuse survivors are now using LSD and MDMA outside of the traditional clinical or shamanic model. It’s about how we are teaching each other to heal; without leaders; without ceremony; without clinics; without government endorsement. This is the story of organic, de-centralised self-healing. Authors, including Florence Rush, Alice Miller, Judith Herman and Louise Armstrong, state that sexual violence against children may be as high as one in every three women in the general population. It is therefore no surprise that society outlaws its own cure. Society allowed the abuse of children to happen on a massive scale. I belong to a group of survivors who no longer require permission from any authority figure or organisation to heal using psychedelics. Authority and hierarchy and power are the very causes of our traumas. Many survivors do not have the money or resources to wait for legalization. I’m here to speak out for them, and to explain a new protocol for MDMA therapy without a therapist.